Dating For Widows

Drop Dead Life on Kickstarter

»Posted on Aug 8, 2013 in BLOG, Coping With Loss, Dating For Widows, Death Of Spouse, DROP DEAD LIFE, Featured, Memoir Excerpts, Parenting & Loss, Publicity, & Interviews, Sudden Death | 0 comments

For the past ten years, I have been advocating for widows, women, defibrillators in schools, and a treatment for Brugada Syndrome—the sudden death cardiac condition both of my daughters, unfortunately, inherited from from my late husband, Erik. And now, I am reaching out for help to reach 100% of my Kickstarter funding goal by 8/19 so that I can publish my forthcoming memoir, Drop Dead Life: A Pregnant Widow’s Heartfelt and Often Comic Journey about Death, Birth, and Rebirth. This is more than a story about widowhood. Drop Dead Life dives deep into the worlds of online dating, hereditary depression, finding humor, parenting, afterlife connection, and the belief that each of us—regardless of our circumstances—can create the love and happiness we...

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Hyla Molander in The Mama Monologues

»Posted on Dec 21, 2010 in BLOG, Dating For Widows, Death Of Spouse, DROP DEAD LIFE, Live Events & Appearances, Publicity, & Interviews, Sudden Death | 0 comments

Last month, I had the honor of reading in “The Mama Monologues” at Corte Madera Book Passage, along with NY Times best-selling author Kelly Corrigan and many other talented Writing Mamas. Special thanks to Dawn Yun, founder of The Writing Mamas, for making this laughter and tear-filled event possible. We raised over $5,000 for Abelina Magana, a Northern California mother of three who was shot 15 times and lived to tell. If you would like to make a contribution to Abelina and her children, all of whom are still very much in need of our help, please send a check to: Attn: The Magana Family Fund, Bank of Marin, 1450 Grant Avenue, Novato, 94945. Please enjoy this video of my piece, “You Think You Know,” which I hope will remind you to embrace...

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Order Up! Single-Parents Dating Online

»Posted on May 15, 2010 in BLOG, Dating For Widows, DROP DEAD LIFE | 0 comments

Match.com. E-Harmony. Yahoo Personals. J-Date. Yup, I signed up for them all. I was a mama on a mission to find love online. More sites, more options. I had tried the club scene. Blaring music. Dim lights. Too much booze. “Nice toes,” one guy had said, looking first at my feet and then straight at my chest. Tall, dressed in black slacks, button-down blue shirt, full head of blonde hair. He certainly was attractive. But way too young and way too interested in my breasts. Tall, dressed in black slacks, button-down blue shirt, full head of blonde hair. He certainly was attractive. But way too young and way too interested in my breasts. “Nice toes?” The white tips of my toenails peeked out from my three-inch-high red, strappy shoes. “You came...

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Easter’s Death Springs Renewal

»Posted on Apr 2, 2010 in BLOG, Dating For Widows, DROP DEAD LIFE | 0 comments

    My dad is Lutheran, my mom is Jewish. My childhood exposed me to traditions from both denominations, but I certainly wouldn’t describe myself as religious. Spiritual, yes. Religious, no. In fact, if there is a god, I’m still pretty pissed off at him. Today, though, I can’t help but contemplate the religious meaning in both Easter and Passover. Seven years ago, on Easter Sunday, my husband, Erik, and I admired our 17-month-old daughter, Tatiana, as she carefully grasped purple and pink polka-dotted eggs in the grass. “Do you think about how lucky we are,” I said to Erik. He rubbed my ripe, pregnant belly. “Yeah, I think about it at least five times a day.” Erik was a rising-star manager for Lucas Digital and I had...

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Sex with Dead Husband?

»Posted on Mar 26, 2010 in BLOG, Dating For Widows, Death Of Spouse, DROP DEAD LIFE, Sex For Widows, Sudden Death | 0 comments

  A friend of mine recently asked me, “Do you ever have sex with Evan and imagine, just for a moment, that you’re having sex with Erik instead?” Normal thing to wonder about a remarried widow, I suppose. Actually, I love that she asked me this. But the answer is NO. Never have I imagined, in the heat of passion, that Evan was Erik. I did, however, imagine that other men I dated were Erik. Of course I wanted them to be Erik. When you watch your 29-year-old husband slide down the kitchen counter and die, there is a certain amount of denial that comes along with the territory. Like staring at the door. Waiting for the knob to turn. Erik, you home? Nope. Not home. Or completely vacating your pregnant body because you cannot believe that you...

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Sexual Tension Grows Between Ex-lovers

»Posted on Dec 5, 2009 in BLOG, Dating For Widows, DROP DEAD LIFE, Sex For Widows | 0 comments

Erik folded his hands beneath his black sweater, his thumbs fidgeting with the wool. “I know we’ re supposed to go to dinner,” he said, “But I don’t know if I can even eat right now.” I laughed. “What? Am I making you sick?” “No, no, not at all, it’s that . . . it’s just a lot, being with you.” Our break-up three years ago was the farthest thing from civil, and I knew, after not seeing eachother for all of that time, we were both uncertain of what we should do with the palpable sexual tension that now filled the two-foot gap between us on the couch. “I was just teasing. I know exactly what you mean. I didn’t think I would be so happy to be with you. Oh, wait, that came out...

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